My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize