You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
