no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
