I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Randomize
