You were right. It hurts to walk today.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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