hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
