Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
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