I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
