why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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