glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
