ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
