Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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