someone get that fucking seahorse.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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