I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
