you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Randomize