He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
my mouth tastes like poor choices
It's Friday. Sex?
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
