he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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