Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
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Hint: Alcohol doesn't make you shit blood. Get yourself checked out.
Haha i puked blood at a party last week
Correction, alcohol gives you ulcers which in turn make you shit blood.... Lay off the sauce!
By chance did you wake up bent over a park bench with your pants around your ankles?
Dude, it is called anal violations. ER or doc's office at the least.
a real friend would've told op that the bleeding isn't from the booze...
FYI : alcohol CAN make you either shit or puke blood or both. I have been a gastro. nurse for 15 years, believe me I've seen it many times.