Texts From Last Night

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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again

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  (973): At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again http://tfl.nu/dnym
  Replies (6) Good night (1109) Bad night (603)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  you want 1 or 2 eggos?

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  (617): i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions (617): you want 1 or 2 eggos? http://tfl.nu/kwdg
  Replies (2) Good night (2100) Bad night (651)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Too much gin, very little bucket

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  (703): Too much gin, very little bucket http://tfl.nu/etvy
  Replies (14) Good night (1039) Bad night (3844)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.

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  (774): It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God. http://tfl.nu/c3gg
  Replies (75) Good night (24606) Bad night (1468)
• Favorite

  (418): View more from Quebec

  I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.

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  (418): I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach. http://tfl.nu/7gys
  Replies (15) Good night (6936) Bad night (1006)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family

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  (973): So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family http://tfl.nu/6om1
  Replies (11) Good night (4009) Bad night (1094)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.

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  (615): Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok. http://tfl.nu/sac8
  Replies (15) Good night (1945) Bad night (4649)
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  (661): View more from California

  new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.

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  (661): new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what. http://tfl.nu/4g32
  Replies (27) Good night (5721) Bad night (1566)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob

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  (570): I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob http://tfl.nu/rxex
  Replies (22) Good night (1109) Bad night (11855)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.

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  (423): I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt. http://tfl.nu/6dgk
  Replies (5) Good night (1123) Bad night (753)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while

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  (+61): I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while http://tfl.nu/v6v9
  Replies (2) Good night (628) Bad night (405)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.

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  (202): I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out. http://tfl.nu/03ma
  Replies (4) Good night (829) Bad night (482)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  SEX BINGO!

  (1-701): View more from North Dakota

  Canadian or clown?

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  (701): SEX BINGO! (1-701): Canadian or clown? http://tfl.nu/877n
  Replies (6) Good night (671) Bad night (373)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm

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  (707): I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm http://tfl.nu/rltc
  Replies (3) Good night (769) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.

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  (206): steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill. http://tfl.nu/2ixz
  Replies (1) Good night (729) Bad night (331)

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