Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions

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(540): View more from Virginia

Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(904): View more from Florida

So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?

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(407): View more from Florida

I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens

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(505): View more from New Mexico

When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.

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(512): View more from Texas

Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?

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