Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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