I just cut my nipple shaving
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
