Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
