I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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