Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
