Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize