dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
