butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Randomize
