Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
