white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Randomize
