No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
