i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
