Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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