you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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