I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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