So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize