dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
