That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
