I accidentally had phone sex last night
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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