Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
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