like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
