Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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