Do you still have your period?
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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