you have to choose: penises or morals?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
