fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
