u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
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In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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