Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
