Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
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