bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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