We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
