you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Fuck appropriateness.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Randomize
