sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Vodka?
Forever.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Randomize
